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Part Two of Rude RED

11/19/2013

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So, as I said before, I woke up. When I looked outside I almost wept. The T. rex compound had worked. She's we're all just standing there scowling at me. They were not amused.. I was however. I started my day at a leisurely pace. You see I get to do that when I don't have to race out in my pj,s and catch escapee,s. I had my coffee, checked my email, got dressed, ate breakfast and then when I was damn good and ready I went outside. Today was moving day for the herd so I wanted to get going and get it over with. Moving the goat herd is probably the most stressful thing I have to do.. Well, that and catching them when they do a walk about. When loading goats in the trailer it is like baking, if you don't follow the recipe exactly your cake flops and caves in on itself. Goat wrangling and specifically loading is like that. If I do not follow my routine exactly, if I skip one tiny step they make my life a living hell. Here is what the routine looks like. 1. Configure the catch chute, 2. Reinforce the catch pen with extra posts and ground stakes on each section of netting to prevent them from crawling under, 3. Have goat mini tazer( small shock device not big) in my pocket and turned on, 4. Have little red shepherds crook in hand ( again damn that comes in handy) 5. Have hammer handy. No not to thump them with but to pound netting post in with after first batch of goats are loaded, 6. Have Pearl in position to herd them down the chute if they are stubborn little butt heads and won't go without her' 7. Take a deep breath, and let the loading commence.. Hopefully, pretty, pretty please with alfalfa pellets on top. So, back to the actual story. Did all of the above, opened the trailer door and damn if they didn't just jump right in, no fuss, no muss, no swearing, no wtf are you doing, nothing but 100% pure unadulterated cooperation. I was like "cool, that,s never been so easy" " it's is going to be an awesome day" I shut the trailer door, tuck the remaining 50 or so goats back into the T Rex pen and head to the truck to pull out. I was high as a kite, singing, whistling, nothing could bring me down... Uhhhhhh well I got a wee bit ahead of myself with that last statement... Did I mention that it rained like cats and dogs the night before, did I mention that I decided not to buy the new set of all terrain tires for my big ass truck this spring because I didn't, want to spend the $3000 it was going to cost to do so and the rainy season was over so I wouldn't need said tires until next winter, did I mention all that? So, the truck and trailer was on a wee little incline on grass and what had been dirt but was now wet dirt otherwise known as slicker than slug slime on a piece of lettuce. Went to pull out put my foot on the accelerator and, " that's weird, we are not moving" Again, still nothing, " shit, it is slick out here" I will just get out and lock the hubs into 4 wheel drive no worries.. Oh now there was movement all right, sideways not forward.. Crap! Ok Tam, think, think, don't panic, don't get pissed, just think" ...go look for something to lay down under the back and front tires on the worst side. I looked around and found some pieces of lumber.. Tried putting them under the tires, nothing... Get some brush and pile it in front of the tires then when the truck moves forward it will run onto the brush, you will have traction and wha la!.... Uhhh nope, just made salad with the brush as the tires spun all over it. There was no way in hell that I was going to do the unthinkable, no way, no how, not ever. I was not going to unload the trailer to get it unstuck. Not after the most pristine goat load in the history of mankind. NO! There had to be another way..
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